Born and Raised in America

I’m pretty positive I’m not the only one who gets confused about what exactly to do on Lunar New Year. I’ve never experienced what it was like in Taiwan or Hong Kong during the holiday. The only things I knew about were the things I learned from my parents and Chinese School.

Fast forward to 2016 and I still don’t have a grasp on what exactly to do for Lunar New Year. I know it involves lots of eating; I understand the food part. In our family, it’s dumplings, chicken, fish, and oranges for good fortune and noodles and spinach for long life. Don’t forget the new year cake!

The part I don’t quite understand is the 紅包 (Hóngbāo), a.k.a. red envelope, part. I knew I used to get a 紅包 every year from my parents and grandparents, but what does this mean now that I’m no longer under my dad’s healthcare plan an adult?

Discovering the Other Half

In a quest to redeem myself, I brought it up with my parents.

“When am I supposed to start giving 紅包 ?” I asked.

To that, both my parents simultaneously answer, “Now.” I love my parents.

After some face-palming from me, my mom continues, “You start giving 紅包 when you start making money. Generally you give them to your parents, grandparents, and kids if you have them. If you’re feeling generous, your nieces and nephews too.”

(Meanwhile, my dad keeps asking for money. “It’s like your first paycheck! You give it all to your parents!”)

I continue, “What about friends’ kids? Coworkers? What if you start making money and then go to grad school and no longer make money? Are you allowed to stop giving 紅包 to people if you have no money?

“What? No. No need to give 紅包 to any of them. And you don’t have to give 紅包 if you have no money.” she answers.

(“Hey! It’s next week! $300!” -dad)

“Wasn’t there something about married couples giving 紅包 to people that are still single?” I ask.

“What? No. We never did that.”

(“How come you aren’t asking me about this instead of Mom?” -dad)

“But it’s all over the internet that it’s something people do! Like, once I’m married, am I supposed to give 紅包 to all my single friends?”

“If you have that much money, sure. Do whatever you want, but I’ve never heard of that.“

(“Your future wife should give me money too!” -dad)

“There’s no rule about it? or tradition?”

“No. there aren’t any rules about any of this. If you can’t afford to give someone a 紅包, then you shouldn’t. Even if you do have money, you give 紅包 like you would any gift, only to people you really care about.”

At this point, my dad finally chimes in with something relevant to the conversation, “No! In Hong Kong, we give 紅包 to anyone and everyone. You just give, give, give! Your door man, your trash man, your bus driver, your dim sum hostess… Nobody has any kids, so you give it to everyone else instead!”

What? Mind blown.

tl;dr

Traditionally, you start give 紅包 once you start making money and can support yourself, but there are no rules that you have to follow in order to avoid being cursed for the next year. 紅包 are like any other gift to your family. Give as much or as little as you can afford and to as many or few people as you’d like.

Happy New Year

Most importantly though, Lunar New Year is about family. Whether or not you give a 紅包 to your parents, make sure you spend some time with your family (TACL family included!) this holiday.

On behalf of the TACL National Board, I wish you a happy new year and have an awesome Year of the Monkey! 新年快樂 (Xīnnián kuàilè), 恭禧發財 (Gōngxǐ fācái)!

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TACL and its programs host cultural events all year round. Check out our programs (TAP, Youth Camps, Internships) to learn how to get involved with your community.